Monday, August 1, 2011
Thursday, July 28, 2011
Wednesday, July 27, 2011
Monday, July 18, 2011
Tuesday, June 28, 2011
Friday, June 24, 2011
Thursday, June 16, 2011
Dear Ms X,
This is an honest review of yourself, by me, the great imbecile; the masterful deceiver; the one with the void inside his golden heart. Or black heart due to non-stop smoking.
Dear Ms X,
Your eyes. Do you realize that you have such beautiful dreamy eyes that i adore so so much? I guess you don't. Because when you looked at me, i know you're not really looking at me. You're looking way behind my shoulder at that perfect guy with 6 pack abs and a cool sunglasses stuck on top of his head. You're just pretending to look at me because you personally know me. If I'm a total stranger i guess you won't even notice I'm there shadowing your every movement, your every step and your every day perfection and imperfection. Because for me, I'm genuinely happy just by looking at you.
Dear Ms X,
The way you walk. Some people might call it retarded or not functioning properly. But for me, it's the golden view; the melancholic beautiful panorama that i surely do not want to miss. Because i secretly adore it. Because i secretly in love with it. To hell with what people say and to hell with people who gazed at you awkwardly.
Dear Ms X,
For months I've been secretly recording the way you smile inside my memory box. Do you realize your eyes will flinch just a moment before you threw that smile? Or do you realize your cheeks will glow up to prepare for your inward smile? I do. Because i love the way you smile. I just can't keep my eyes of it. I know you realized I've been staring at you, but you just don't say anything about it. Maybe you are scared because you think I'm a psychopath or a sex maniac. Or maybe you just think I'm this kind of person who just want to woo girls.
Dear Ms X,
If that is what you want to hear from me, because you personally think that i just like you for your face, so be it. Because i know deep inside of what i truly feel Ms X. And i know i won't go and woo you because personally i just think I'm not worth it. You're too perfect for me. It's hard for me, who with all these imperfection to be with you; side by side. And i know damn sure that it's just impossible for you to even like me.
Dear Ms X,
Because of that, I've decided to just gaze, stare, look, adore you from afar. I can't describe you with enough adjective. Because it is just too damn impossible. Because i know deep inside of me, just by adoring you from afar, will obviously makes me happy enough. And i will continue to be your number one fan, your friend no matter what. Even if you don't even like me.
Because you're my genuine inception Ms X. And i promise you, i will always be the one who will always be there. No matter if you just need a friend to chat with; need a guy to consult you after a messy break ups; need advice on your next in line soon to be boyfriend; and anything else that you wanted be it just a shopping partner. I'll pretend i even like shopping (although it bores me to death) just for you if that what makes you happier and stress free.
Because Ms X, if you really really want to know, I'm happy and satisfied by just being a side shadow for you. I'm also happy by just walking in your shadow and to adore you even from far away.
And for damn sure I'm really happy to be your friend.
Tuesday, May 10, 2011
It's been a long long time since i last put a note for myself on facebook. It has also been a long time since i need to remind myself of something that is such dear to me. Usually that is the case when I'm feeling so down, or when i miss my mother.
But today, it's neither of that. Today, perhaps; for the first time, it's just me and my inept remarks of myself.
So what is it all about? It's the void. The same damn void that i felt many years ago. It keeps on appearing puncturing a hole deep inside of me; making me feel soulless and empty.
I've kept myself occupied, i gained a lot of nice friends to talk with; to hang out with. I've somehow attach myself to a person i can call a brother.
So why does it keeps on appearing; the void? Was it me? Did i do something wrong? Did i miss anything? Why?
To be honest with, i don't even know.
I need someone. Someone to keep reminding me of something that i don't even know about. And that doesn't make any sense at all. But i know i do need someone, someone to miss to, someone to keep my smile on. But i just don't know who.
Someone to keep me mesmerized, is that even possible?
I used to ignore these kind of bullshit; thinking it's just me and my head. But i know deep inside, i can't keep on ignoring this void as it is growing bigger and bigger; puncturing and rending a deeper hole on my soul.
Will i one day be soulless, keeps on wandering like i have no purpose in life?
I do not want that. I have to find a cure. I have to find the elixir; the remedy to this prolonged sickness.
So, will you be my cure?
Thursday, April 28, 2011
Sunday, April 3, 2011
Suddenly my friend, got into my room and checked her out as well. He then said, "Dude, try google this, "Ballerina Bun". I was reluctant at first. But then he managed to convince me so I did. And so I google-ed this "Ballerina Bun". Cus of the latency of the speed of my broadband, only a picture got out. And I said to him, "Dude, she is old -.- WTF man". And few seconds after that, heaps of pictures comin out with different faces. I was like err what is this. YOU GOT ME BRO. That moment, I laughed hard, like real hard. "Ballerina Bun" is actually a hairstyle. Haha. You really made my day bro, you did. You got me. Cheers :)